In Love With Two Men...What To Do?

Most Would Brag About Being In Love With 2 People

But For Me...It Was A Damn Nightmare!!!

I remember the look on Abofa's face when he found out about my NC lover.  He looked through my phone and read all of the text in our thread.  He also seen all the steamy pictures we had been sending to one another.

I was angry, furious, and felt violated!  How could he?  Who does he think he is?  Our relationship was so new, plus I was honest to him when we first started dating and I told him about my NC Lover that I have been seeing for a couple of years.  He really didn’t put much concern into it and now all of a sudden he's acting so surprised to see us communicating.

Abofa asked me if I cared about my NC Lover and I replied yes but actually I was madly in love with him.  At this time I wasn’t completely sure about my feelings with Abofa...We had only been dating for a couple of months and I knew my NC lover for a couple of years now.

It has been a while since the last time I spoke to my NC Lover.  Our last conversation didn’t go so well.  He calls me while he was drunk, cussing and fussing at me.  I don’t know why he was mad that I had fell in love with someone else.  Before I met my Abofa, I gave him so many opportunities to tell me how he felt about me, about us.  

 He would tell me he loved and missed me but would never elaborate on if we would move our relationship forward.  I could always tell my NC Lover was holding back his feelings but that never stopped me from expressing my love to him.  I always told him he would make a great husband.  He cooks, cleans, works, owns multiple properties, takes care of his family and most of all he was attractive had a body like Spartan and very romantic! 

So, how do you decide when you have two good qualities, sexy men in your life?  That was the question that had me so mind boggled.  I thought about this for months and it was driving me crazy!  My Abofa was giving me everything I wanted, needed, and was in the same state (that’s a major plus for me because Im not attracted to the men in DMV area!)

I haven’t seen my NC lover in about a year and I was missing him like crazy.  He was trying to make plans for me to visit him but I decided not to go because I didn’t want to put myself in a situation and plus I was still confused about where we stood.

Finally, I thought It was best to hold off and let my life run its course.  I’m glad I did, because I can put my focus on a new and fresh relationship. A True love that took me 30 years to find!  My Abofa has opened my eyes to a love I never had before.   I gave my NC Lover a chance to show and tell me what his love was all about and all I got was a tough exterior and tough love.  

I’ve been through so much in my life and unfortunately for my NC lover I wasn’t looking for more.  As the days go on I decided to put my NC Lover to the test and ask him more questions about us.  It turns out he has no real plans about us, present or future.  He did say he was going to help me move closer and if the relationship didn’t work out at least I would be closer to my family in Georgia. 

 I was ok with that before I met my Abofa, plus It was quite clear he didn’t believe in us, so why should I?Leave my Abofa, move to Georgia and still be alone?   I don’t think so!!!  Abofa didn’t really talk about plans for us either but we didn’t have the history like my NC lover and I had.  Abofa has what I need, that Is LOVE, PURE, GENUINE, AND ITS FLOWING OUT FREELY! J   I will take Love over history and a weekend rendezvous any day. 

Even though it took me a couple of months to realize who was best for me, now I can allow myself to accept my blessings and not have a guilty conscious about where my heart lays.   It comes down to this... HISTORY = HIS-STORY…HE HAD NONE!!! HIS-HEART…HE HAD NONE!!! So I choose to do no wrong and BE GONE!!!   I chose Heart over History…Love will always win!!!